Halloween wrap-up

In an hour and a half we had 136 ghouls, goblins, vampires, fairy princesses, hobos and more knock on our door. Spiderman was here; so was A-Rod.
And all but the tiniest (they can barely talk so they have an excuse) said 'Thank you.'
It was a lot of kiddos.
Kid Two terrified Trick or Treaters by standing like a statue next to Ralph's van in the driveway.
A few children poked him, not sure if he were real. He dressed as V from the 2006 thriller "V for Vendetta." No, I did not see that movie. Nor will I ever see it.
Ever.

Holiday season is officially here ~ * ~

Today is Halloweeeeeeeeeen.
I am anxiously awaiting the first ding-dong of our doorbell with the early Trick or Treaters. It will be some wee tykes looking up at me, dressed as princesses and pirates, ballerinas and baseball players. Or Winnie the Pooh and Piglet, too.
They are adorable. There will be some tiny tots being pushed in strollers, wondering what they are doing out at night.
Then the kindergartners through fifth graders will show up. They are usually polite and say thank you when we drop the goodies in their bags.
Then the middle school and high school kids arrive. By the tons, it seems. The boys will be dressed as Dracula or the Grim Reaper, the girls will be pajama-clad babies with pacifiers and pigtails. A few hobos and assorted monsters might pass through as well.
Then the candy and bags of pretzels run out. And we turn out light.
Note: all ages and times are approximate. But that is how it seems to flow, and we get more than 120 kids at our door. ;-D

Next up is turkey day. Gobble gobble. It's only three weeks away. Gobble gobble. I get into the habit of saying gobble gobble each November.
Creative, isn't it?
And the next day is Kid Two's birthday. He will be 17. Yikes.
Then we turn around and it's December.........And we all know what that month means.
Happy holiday season kickoff to all.

Halloween humor, just because

A bald man with a wooden leg is invited to a Halloween party. He
doesn't know what costume to wear to hide his head and his leg so he
writes to a costume company to explain his problem.
A few days later, he received a parcel with the following note:

Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a pirate's outfit. The spotted handkerchief
will cover your bald head and, with your wooden leg, you will be just
right as a pirate.

Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.



The man thinks this is terrible because they have emphasized his
wooden leg and so he writes a letter of complaint. A week goes by
and he receives another parcel and a note, which says:

Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a monk's habit. The long robe will cover your
wooden leg and, with your bald head, you will really look the part.

Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.


Now the man is really upset since they have gone from emphasizing
his wooden leg to emphasizing his bald head so again he writes the
company another nasty letter of complaint. A week later he gets a
small parcel and a note, which reads:

Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a bottle of molasses and a bag of crushed nuts.
Pour the molasses over your bald head, pat on crushed nuts, stick
your wooden leg up your ass and go as a caramel apple.

Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.

~

Q. What did the ghost teacher say to the class?

A. Watch the board and I'll go through it again.

Hahahahahahahahahaha

Some interesting costume ideas

Weird, isn't it?
Not the Wonder Woman I remember.

Dear regular readers,
Please don't hate me for exposing you to these pictures.
I just can't think of anything to write about at the moment.
Let's just all get into the Halloween spirit here.


So, do you have your costume ready for Halloween?

Something I penned in December '91

This column was published almost 16 years ago in the now-defunct paper for which I worked. Writing a column about daily life for several years was a fun part of the job.
And this one has babies in it. What could be better?

Cinderella ain't what she used to be
Did you know Cinderella had a baby? You didn't?
Just come to our house and you'll discover that we're writing the sequel to the classic fairy tale.
Our daughter, Allegra, who will soon turn 3, has a vivid imagination. Although she doesn't know too many fairy tales yet - Winnie the Pooh and Disney Babies are more popular at our house - those she does know she knows by heart.
And day by day in every way, she is living them.
If, for example, you ask her what her name is, she will reply: "Snow White."
My moniker, according to her, is "Cinderella." My husband's new name - you guessed it - is Prince. And, best of all, her 1-year old little brother, Cameron, is "Cinderella's Baby."
I love it. I couldn't have thought up this new family group if I tried.
But it does get confusing. A few times I made the mistake of calling her Cinderella. She let me know I was wrong. "I'm Snow White," she said indignantly.
There's more.
Her room is actually Snow White's Castle and she calls our bedroom Cinderella's Castle.
Cameron's bedroom is - what else? Cinderella's Baby's Castle.
Outside our house you'll find yet another dramatization: we have one-medium-sized tree in the front yard and it too is Snow White's Castle - outside edition.
Just ask Allegra.
When I get home from work, she comes running over to give me a hug, yelling, "Cinderella! Cinderella! You're home!"
And when her father pulls the car into the driveway a few hours later, she screeches: "Cinderella! It's Prince! He's home!"
You simply haven't lived until you've lived under the same roof with royalty - especially when you are part and parcel of the Royal Family.
What's next? My husband is the Wizard of Oz, I'm the Scarecrow, Allegra is Dorothy and Cameron is a munchkin?
Why not? We live on (insert our town's name) Hilltop, which is so wonderfully quiet and idyllic it could almost pass for Oz.
Or what about Allegra as Alice in Wonderland, with me and my husband playing Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum and her baby brother as the White Rabbit?
It's a possibility.
I know; since I seem to be tired all the time, I think I'll put in for a new name - Sleeping Beauty. Ah, what a luxury a nice, long rest would be.
But I don't think my supercharged daughter would approve. The only time she seems to want all-out, total communication is when I'm sound, sound asleep - which, with my present schedule is once every two weeks or so. Sleeping Beauty, I'm afraid, would not be an appropriate role because in my house, she would rarely sleep at all.
How about the Wicked Witch of the West? Now there's a role I could really get into.

I got an award ~ and it's a sweet one

Thanks to dear Lynn for sending this my way. Lynn received this award from the Rocky Mountain Retreat blogger Michele, who was honored with it by its creator, Trista at the Pumkin Patch.
I just visited Trista's blog for the first time, and she is a young mother of two adorable children. And a talented graphics person (unlike yours truly).

Quoting Trista, here's how it works:
"1. Once you've been awarded the Sweet Treat Award, make a post and award it to 3 bloggers who you deem "One Sweet Treat to Read" everyday.
2. Make sure you inform those who you awarded that they have won!
3. Grab the button and proudly display it in your sidebar for all your old/new readers to see!"

I shall pass this on to three women I always enjoy visiting: Odat,
Linda,
and Mimi.

Now to put it in my sidebar.

Substitute life

OK, time to get serious here. No more Halloween riddles. Today's topic is substitute teaching and the courage it takes.
Just ask Ralph. He has survived five days of it, and was all ready this morning for the automated call to go back in, and the phone didn't ring.
Relieved? Maybe. But he feels now that the kids in music class will be wondering where he is, since he played some select CDs yesterday ("Rubber Soul" was one, Brian Setzer another) and today was ready to ask them to "deconstruct" a rap song they told him they liked.
He looked up the lyrics last night and was prepared to work with them on something in which they had expressed interest.

* Update: Ralph called the employment agency after I wrote this. There was an assignment at the high school. Kid Two groaned...too bad, huh? Dad's at his school.
Ralph is teaching science today. Well, not teaching, but babysitting science classes. More later.

More riddles ~ I looked them up so you don't have to

What do you call a friendly dead Egyptian?
A chummy mummy

What is it like to be kissed by a vampire?
It's a pain in the neck

What did the ghost buy for his haunted house?
Home-moaners insurance


What was the witch's favorite subject?
Spelling

What instrument do skeletons play?
Trom-bone

Substitute teaching update

It's Tuesday, so my husband must be a 7th grade math teacher!
Yes, Ralph is back at middle school, with all the little darlin's (sarcasm creeping into post). Yesterday he subbed for the music teacher as he did Friday. Today it's 'rithmetic.
Please wish him luck in this brave new world of substitute teaching.

UPDATE of the update: he ended up subbing for the music teacher again

Halloween riddles ~ and hopefully giggles

Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
Dayscare centers

How do witches tell time?
They look at their witch watch

What do you call a skeleton that won't work?
Lazy bones

Why do mummies make good employees?
They get all wrapped up in their work

What do you call a fat jack-o'-lantern?
A plumpkin

What do ghosts serve for dessert?
Ice scream

That's all for now.

BlogBlast for Peace approacheth

I made another peace globe last week.
I was saving it for BlogBlast for Peace on Nov. 7, but decided to unveil it today.
I know Queen Mimi, founder of the Peace Globe Movement, will be happy that I posted it. It's supposed to remind people to take a few minutes, make a peace globe and ship it on over to her.
Visit Mimi to learn the simple steps to take to make one.
C'mon, you can do it! If I can, you can.

Busy Saturday

Yesterday was a long day, but fun. It was parents' weekend so we left home early to spend time with our Kid One. She is doing well and having a wonderful college experience and we're happy about that.

We left campus to go to a family baby shower at Ralph's sister's house. He didn't have the portable ramps in the van so he had to stay outside. Fortunately it was a stunningly beautiful and warm day, and people made their way out to the van with food for him and to chat.

While there, I got to hold Chunkaccino. Adam is a mellow little guy (now almost 23 pounds) and doesn't mind being held by someone he doesn't know. He has beautiful blue eyes. And he already has two tooth buds on the bottom. Go Adam!!
I didn't want to let him go. He was doing just fine on my lap.

A monstrously good time

I visited a Haunted House for work yesterday. I was doing a story for next week that, surprise, surprise, has a Halloween theme.
My tour through a cob-webby jail cell, mad scientist's lab, and a deli where what was being sliced was, well, human, was in the daytime.
The lights were on, and there was a crew of carpenters, electricians and other workers there feverishly putting the finishing touches on the house.
There were no spine-tingling sound effects playing to spook the molasses out of a person. And no costumed people popping out to do the same.
That was my kind of Haunted House.

My idea of Halloween celebrating is more along the lines of pumpkin decorating, pumpkin carving and bobbing for apples. Does anyone really bob for apples anymore? Probably just virtual apples online or something.
I guess just writing about the horrors that await paying visitors there was enough to give me a nightmare. That's why I am wide awake and posting instead of sleeping.

So, how different is life today?

You've Changed 8% in 10 Years

You've hardly changed in ten years, from your lifestyle to those very retro clothes. And unless you were really ahead of your time, you probably need to acquaint yourself with the modern world!

How Much Have You Changed in 10 Years?

* I guess these quizzes are for 24-year olds. I was not in high school 10 years ago, as the photo might suggest. ;-)

I'm cheatin' here

When in doubt about what to write, post some pictures.
I have some interesting stuff on "our" desk. Ralph has some too, but most of the fun stuff belongs to yours truly.
I have kitty cats. I posed them here by the phone.
<---
Ralph has a Ford Club Wagon plushie. --->
It can be squeezed and used as a STRESS reliever, if need be.
That's the report from our little space in the universe.

What do you have on your desk?

Thanks, Odat for the quizzes...

You Are

An Angry Pumpkin Face You would make a good smashed pumpkin.

What's Your Pumpkin Face?

Your Monster Profile

Demon Murderer You Feast On: Hot Dogs You Lurk Around In: Candy Factories You Especially Like to Torment: Groupies

What's Your Monster Name?

Warning: Watch out at the Halloween party

A woman got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the Halloween party alone.
He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going.
So he took his costume and away he went.

The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, woke without pain and as it was still early, decided to go to the party.
As her husband didn't know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband in his costume,
cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice 'chick' he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there.
His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his new partner high and dry and devoted his time to her.
She let him go as far as he wished, since he was her husband. After more drinks he finally whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and made passionate love in the back seat. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous behavior.

She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of time he had.
'I never have a good time when you're not there.'
'Then she asked,'Did you dance much?'
He replied, 'I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Joe, and Bill Brown and played poker all evening.'
'You must have looked really silly wearing that costume playing poker all night!' she said with unashamed sarcasm.
To which the husband replied, 'Actually, I gave my costume to your brother, and apparently he had the time of his life.'

Avatar visits the Hall of Mirrors

I've had an avatar for awhile now and today I decided to dress her up and show her off. As you can see she has white cat for a pet and a gnome for a companion.
It's like playing with a paper doll. There are lots of fun accessories from which to choose.
I'm embarrassed to say she doesn't have a name, but I'm open to any suggestions.

She had been hanging around at the beach in recent months, but I daresay it must have been getting a bit chilly. So she's inside now, out of the elements.
Speaking French. Eating petits fours. Drinking champagne. Dancing.

It's normal to play with an avatar, right?

From the e-mail bag (not my usual G-rated fare)

The Origin of Yodeling ~

Many years ago a man was traveling through the mountains of Switzerland .
Nightfall was rapidly approaching and he had nowhere to sleep. He went up to a farmhouse and asked the farmer if he could spend the night. The farmer told him that he could sleep in the barn.
As the story goes, the farmer's daughter asked her father, 'Who is that man going into the barn?'
'That fellow traveling through needs a place to stay for the night, so, I told him he could sleep in the barn.'

The daughter said, 'Perhaps he is hungry.'So she prepared him a plate of food for him and then took it out to the barn.About an hour later, the daughter returned. Her clothing disheveled and straw in her hair.
Straight up to bed she went.

The farmer's wife was very observant. She then suggested that perhaps the man was thirsty. So she fetched a bottle of wine, took it out to the barn, and she too did not return for an hour.
Her clothing was askew, her blouse buttoned incorrectly. She also headed straight to bed.
The next morning at sunrise the man in the barn got up and continued on his journey, waving to the farmer as he left.
When the daughter awoke and learned that the visitor was gone, she broke into tears. 'How could he leave without even saying goodbye,' she cried. 'We made such passionate love last night!'
'What?' shouted the father as he angrily ran out of the house looking for the man, who by now was halfway up the mountain.
The farmer screamed up at him, 'I'm going to get you! You had sex with my daughter!'
The man looked back down from the mountainside, cupped his hand next to his mouth, and yelled out.....

'LAIDTHEOLADEETOO'

SQUASH-ed

For the past year my husband Ralph, a.k.a. Airhead55, and I have been contributing once a month to a blog called Fit Fare. I am not a cook, but he enjoys cooking and together we can make a meal happen. My friend Sarah who authors the blog Cucina Bella, also edits Fit Fare. I have both of them listed on my sidebar and you really should give them a look-see.

At the moment I am baking glazed acorn squash rings. If you knew me in person you'd be shocked that I was doing this on a quiet Sunday afternoon (I really want a nap!).
I am multi-tasking, making the recipe and then running back to write about it on another template.
Ralph isn't feeling his best today. Maybe this healthy recipe will kill whatever ails him. As long as it doesn't kill him. Yikes.

Acorn squash is not easy to slice into rings, I can attest. I wrestled with it long enough and somehow got the thing sliced without calling upon Kid Two and his upper-body strength.
Healthy harvest eating to all...

Ready to teach a Bible lesson

I'm off to teach a Sunday School class of five (a young group, ages 3 to almost 8) for the first time. I had been teaching an older class, but now they are getting ready for confirmation. The lesson is from Samuel in the Old Testament.

When I come back, I may post something humorous that is not my usual G-rated fare. Would that be bad? Would I feel guilty? Especially after just guiding little children in Sunday School? I am unsure what to do.

And look what Linda gave me

This award warms my heart. Santa rocks!
I'm a Yuletide person, through and through. I was born on Dec. 29, the day before my father's birthday... And when I became a mother for the first time, I had my daughter on Dec. 29. Some people say we are a lot alike. I wonder why...



I stole Linda's info about this honor:
This award originated at Santa's Community Blog and can be passed on to as many other bloggers as I'd like. According to Santa, the Spirit of Christmas Award:

"Quite simply it is those that have a generous and giving nature. Those who care about others. Those who have a kind word to say or a broad shoulder to lean on in the times that others need that. Those who display the "Spirit of Christmas".

There are many people I would like to pass this award along to, but since Linda kindly gave the award to my husband as well, and he and I share several blog friends, I will only choose three: Lynn, Odat, and Michael C.
(Michael's birthday is on Christmas Eve, so naturally he loves Christmas too!)

Awardees can pick up the award code here and then pass it on to whomever they also feel displays the "Spirit of Christmas".

Thank you, Linda, for thinking of me.



click here for:

Look what Mimi gave me

Click to get yours


And you can get one too!

'Twas a busy Thursday~ Friday's looking busy too

Yesterday was busy for us. I took my mother to have cataract surgery on eye #2, so that means she now is all done! The doctor said the surgery went really well and it was easier than the first one (is he getting more practice?) That was a joke.

While I was at the hospital with her, Ralphie was "enjoying" his very first day as a substitute teacher. And with beginner's luck he got stuck with probably the most difficult age - seventh graders.
But he did it and lived to tell about it. He will probably post about it later today, after he brings our son to visit a college here in Connecticut.
Meanwhile Kid Two missed school because was helping out at a health and safety fair for senior citizens. The National Honor Society members were invited to spend the day doing some community service. It got a bit boring, I guess. But they got out of classes!
Last night I made my peace globe, with a little help from the aforementioned son. (See previous post. ) Dear Mimi, founder of the Peace Globe movement, likes it. So I'm happy. She sent me a T-shirt already for my blog (yay!).
Today after my mother gets her eye covering taken off at the doctor's office I am doing a story about a teacher from a local technical high school who is being featured on "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" Sunday night. That should be interesting.

P.S. Enjoy the comic. And have a sparkling day.


toothpastefordinner.com

~ Blogging for peace ~

I am showing off my latest creation for the next BlogBlast for Peace.
This is a reminder to go visit Mimi, founder of the Peace Globe Movement in the Blogosphere, and get instructions on how to get your peace globe ready for Nov. 7.

What a wonderful man

I met the 98-year-old World War II veteran I wrote about Tuesday in person yesterday. He is indeed a quipster who knows how to work a room...
He had led me to believe on the phone that only a few people would be at City Hall to honor him. Try close to 100, mostly friends, since his family is quite small.
He teased me about stuff, then asked sweetly, "Do you still love me?" with a twinkle in his eye. I hesitated. He didn't like the fact I hesitated.
Everyone laughed as he cracked joke after joke. He said people are living longer today, and if you are miserable you will live longer yet.
I stayed longer than I had planned. He had a line of well-wishers waiting to say hello to him and he asked me to stay so we could chat a bit.
What could I say? Certainly not no. That's not a time to be in a rush.

At the end of the party, he asked me again if I still loved him.
You can guess my response.

Another Chinese toy recalled

Time passages

Yesterday I had what I thought was going to be a brief phone call with a man who is turning 98 tomorrow. As it turned out, the conversation wasn't brief. He is quite the talker.
What amazed me was at that age he was lucid, and he could even hear what I was saying to him.
It was inspiring!
He went into the Navy during World War II at age 35 and recently attended a reunion of his shipmates, all much younger than he. They were all "18 or 19" at the time, he told me. He was full of stories.

Tomorrow our mayor is honoring him on his birthday with a ceremony and refreshments at City Hall. This youngster served on several commissions in the past and is the oldest World War II veteran in our city.
I'm looking forward to meeting him tomorrow.
To be continued...

Let there be art ~

Posting another video today, because I can.

got Diet Coke?

My son says this has been around for awhile, but it's the first I've seen of it. Diet Coke and Mentos video...Turn on your speakers and give a look-see.

Update of previous post...

Here's part of the talk by Henry Lee I attended last week:

Lee injected humor into his presentation, joking about what he called “the stages of aging.” The first, he said, is “you forget names.” Audience members nodded in agreement.
“The second stage is you forget faces,” he said, and again those in the audience nodded. "The third stage is when you go to the men’s room and forget to zip up,” Lee joked, and startled audience members laughed.
The fourth stage of aging, he added, “is when you forget to zip down.”

Humor at serious seminar startles

My job is certainly interesting, if nothing else.
On Wednesday I attended a workshop that dealt with the issue of elder abuse. Unfortunately there must be a lot of it going on out there.
The more famous of the two keynote speakers was Henry C. Lee, the world-renowned forensic scientist. He's a truly brilliant man, seen as one of the top experts in his field.
I've watched him on TV and read about him and the high-profile cases he has been involved with for years (i.e. O.J. Simpson, JonBenet Ramsey, Laci Peterson, among others). Little did I know that he is hysterically funny.
Lee regaled the audience of health care, social work and law enforcement professionals (about 175 people) with stories about his experiences. He had everyone laughing out loud. Many of us were startled at first at his humor. He knows how to keep his audience interested.

If he ever retires as a forensic scientist, investigator, defense and prosecution consultant as well as chief emeritus of the Connecticut State Police (a job that pays $1 a year, he said) Lee definitely has a future in stand-up comedy.

Hmmmm...thinking, thinking

I'm considering starting up a second blog. The name of it would be "Too Sensitive For My Own Good."
It could be quite interesting. To me, anyway.

There goes the bride

marriedtothesea.com

Mi-mi-mi ME!

Odat posted this "When I Am Famous" meme today and I thought I'd give it a whirl...

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Humphrey Hyundai

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
Chocolate Chocolate Chip

3. YOUR “FLY Guy” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
Pvil

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
Detective Pink Cat

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
McDonald New Haven

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
Vilpa

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
The Blue Milk

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)
Hugh Charles

9. STRIPPER NAME: (the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy)
Rose chocolate

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names )
Kathryn Donald

11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)
Moran Minneapolis

12. SPY NAME/BOND GIRL: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)
Autumn Tulip

13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “y”)
Apple Jeansy

14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)
Waffle willow

15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”) The Blog Fog Tour

I'm not tagging anyone, just recommending doing this for a bit o' fun.

Back by popular demand: more self-revelation

A couple of problematic things come to mind to share.

One is that I can't stop saying "Woopsie Doodley Do" when something goes awry.
For this problem I am blaming Ned Flanders (the Simpsons' next-door neighbor for you non-viewers). He is extremely clean-cut, doesn't swear and is always saying dorky things. On Sunday night's episode he said "Okilly-dokilly."
I'm all for making up words, but I'm starting to annoy myself.

#2 Am I the only person who consistently gets bitten by fleas when I go to discount stores? If this isn't annoying I don't know what is. I get bites on my ankles and around my waist. They just jump off the merchandise and head for my skin. Fortunately it doesn't happen in the supermarket I patronize.
Ralph doesn't have this problem. Neither do our children. My skin must be sweet...

All for now. Stop by again soon.